Profiles in History
Posted by they4kman on Friday, September 11, 2009 at 12:56 a.m. (6 months ago)
The following excerpts are transcripts of the knockoff movie Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh-eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2 - In Shocking 2-D
George Bernard Shaw
George Bernard Shaw was at a dinner party one evening and became involved in a conversation with a young lady. He said to the young lady, "Ma'am, if someone paid you one million dollars to sleep with them, would you?" And she said, "Uh, yes; yes, that's a lot of money. Of course I would." George Bernard Shaw smiled and said, "Well, that's interesting. If someone paid you five dollars to sleep with them, would you?" And the young lady said, "Five dollars? That's ridiculous. That's no money at all. Of course not. What do you think I am?" George Bernard Shaw smiled again and said, "We've already established what you are. Now we're just trying to establish a price."
Calvin Coolidge
Calvin Coolidge was one of the presidents of the United States, and was referred to by many friends as "Quiet Cal," because he never really spoke too much. There was a socialite—a young lady—who knew Calvin Coolidge and who thought that she could get him to speak. She made a bet with her friends that she could get Calvin Coolidge to say more than two words. She threw a party and invited Calvin Coolidge. He was there. He was standing in a corner and she was with her friends. She looked at him and smiled and waved; and he smiled back. She walked up to him and said, "I'll be quite frank with you. I made a bet with my friends that I could you to say more than two words." Calvin Coolidge looked at her and said, "You lose," and walked away.
Edgar Allen Poe
Edgar Allen Poe was at a dinner party and became engaged in a conversation with a woman. The conversation took a turn for the worse and very soon it became an argument. Finally, the lady, very angry, said to Edgar Allen Poe, "Mr. Poe, if you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee." Edgar Allen Poe, without missing a beat, said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
* All photos and profile texts taken directly from the film *
Comments
Re: Profiles in History
Posted by Slorp on Monday, December 28, 2009 at 3:41 p.m. (2 months, 1 week ago)
sdfasf
Re: Profiles in History
Posted by shoobydooby on Monday, November 30, 2009 at 11:20 p.m. (3 months, 1 week ago)
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Re: Profiles in History
Posted by meow on Monday, November 30, 2009 at 2:25 a.m. (3 months, 1 week ago)
SLEUTH POTATO PIE